You guys remember how I feel about always speaking your mind, right? Unless the timing, intentions, and the messenger are just right, I’m not a fan of it.
Admittedly, I’m a little biased. I also have an edge when it comes to verbal restraint. (Says the woman who talks about balls so often.)
First, I’m an introvert. Which basically means I prefer to understand, analyze and work through my inner freak show of feelings and thoughts before opening my mouth and subjecting others to it. (PS. You’re welcome.)
Second, I’m a therapist. So my favorite way of helping people is to be awesome at listening, reading between the lines, and occasionally saying (or asking) something important at just the right time and not any sooner.
But as a therapist I can also tell you that every so often the unedited truth must be told for one’s own emotional well-being, for the good of your loved ones, and for the good of the world.
Sometimes you MUST speak the truth, even if you are scared of how much life would change if you did. And sometimes the truth must be spoken because the only thing worse than taking that risk is how little life would change if you didn’t.
I love the quote above. In fact, I would say the more a particular truth makes your voice shake, the more important it is for you to say it. Because if your voice is shaking, it means what’s being shared is such a profound part of who you are you’d risk everything to honor it.
My voice shakes after I, or others, have been abused in some way and I express my hurt and anger about it. Anger makes my voice shake because I hate admitting when I feel that particular emotion, let alone express it in front of others. I’m always afraid my anger will spin out of control, that I’ll turn into She-Hulk, and that I’ll say something I can’t take back. I’m afraid of my anger. I’m afraid of hurting people. I’m afraid they’ll leave me.
But part of living a brave life is knowing when to say scary things out loud for the sake of achieving more balance and beauty in your own life and in our global community.
Am I brave enough to fight for my own emotional well-being? Am I brave enough to fight for the well-being of the people I love? Am I brave enough to protest global injustice and bring about lasting change for people I’ve never met? Sometimes. Not always.
But I do know that when I hear my own voice shake as I speak my truth, I am, in that moment, feeling brave enough to try.
Your Turn: What great truth was difficult for you to say out loud? How did doing so change your life, your community, or our world?