The only thing I love more than good dancers are bad dancers.
Why? Because bad dancers have balls. They don’t have to look good to have a good time. They’re not concerned with impressing anyone. They’re free of the self-consciousness that keeps the shy ones by the punch bowl. They OWN their goofiness. And at the end of the party they wear their exhausted smile and sweaty forehead like gold medals on an Olympic champion. And they should. Because being you and not caring what anyone else thinks is a pretty damn significant accomplishment in life.
One important truth self-conscious dancers should note is that people are paying a lot less attention to them than they think. Ladies: Unless your nipples are showing through your top, no one is looking at you. Trust me. And men: Unless you see said nipple lady and are umm, physically responding to it, no one is looking at you, either.
Another important truth is that attitude is more important than your actual dance moves. It’s actually okay to be really off tempo, a little stiff, or kind of ridiculous. Because if you do all of that with a smile on your face people will treat you like a rock star. Carefree confidence is irresistible. It makes people happy when they see you happy.
But. If your booty needs more than just the pep talk above, here are a few specific tips for self-conscious dancers. All you need to do to rule the dance floor is:
- Pick a partner.
- Coordinate your outfits – but if you can’t, simply coordinate your pelvic thrusts.
- Perfect your sassy dance face. (You can choose from: pissed off puckered lips OR angry cat face – “Roar!”.)
- Have fun.
I wish you brave booty blessings, my fellow Cajones Crusaders. Now go forth and dance!